My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Gay?
German.
Pity.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
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