I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
Randomize
