If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
I feel like a drive thru vagina
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