Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
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