That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Randomize
