My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize