That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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