Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
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