How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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