Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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