Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
