I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Randomize
