oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
