i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
Randomize
