But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
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