So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
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