Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
how does that bad decision feel?
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