Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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