he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
Randomize
