He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Randomize
