we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
Randomize
