so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
