I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
