Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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