i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
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