Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
Randomize
