He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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