East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Randomize
