okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
Randomize
