is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
