So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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