I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
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