We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Randomize
