I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Randomize
