Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
Where is the hickey?
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
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