Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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