Whod you bang
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize