This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
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