I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
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