What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I would ride that face into the sunset
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
