I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Randomize
