Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Randomize
