yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
