Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
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