What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
Do you still have your period?
Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
this will be a night to untag.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize
