i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Randomize