just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Randomize
