this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
Randomize
