Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Randomize
