I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
